Symbols

Through life there are certin things that seem to symbolize different times in my life and different people. Tonight one of those things has come home with me and while I'm happy to have it I'm filled with sadness.

Growing up my Grandma had lots of teacups and things along with nicknacks that I had bought her through the years. She also bought a cabnet to put all those things in when she moved from Florida to Michigan. It was always understood that when she passed I would recieve these things. I'm sad to say that as most of you know she moved on to Heaven this past April and now that I have a house these things have made it home to me.

I don't know how to put into words what it feels like to be happy that they are here but sad at what it means. How can you be happy and sad at the same time? I stare at the glass cabnet and my feelings are so mixed. I wish it wasn't here, I wish she was here. There are so many things happening in my life right now that I would give anything to have her here to share it all with. I know she would be beyond happy that we now have a house and she would be beyond thrilled to have Ellen coming.

She sees all of this I know, and I know that she is here with me every step of the way, I can only hope that she is happy and proud and I can only wish she was here in the flesh.